So, I have this friend named Grace. She is part of the writing group that convenes weekly at the local Barnes and Noble. We call her ‘Giggles’, cause she does, a lot, and we love her so.
Says Grace; “My boyfriend broke up with me last night.”
Says I; “Are you alright? What happened?”
Said she; “We were up until 5am on Facebook and he said he thought we should end it. He was having a crisis and couldn’t deal.”
Then said I; “How do you feel about it?
And she replied; “Sad, a little confused and a little mad”
Me; “I’ll bet. Let’s write a scathing break-up poem about him!”
Her; Giggling, “Yes!”
What follows is the tragedy inspired chronicle of the end of a romance.
WARNING!!! Angst and ‘F’ bombs ahead!
And, Don’t mess with my friends!
Erasing Grace It’s not you, it’s me He said with self-deprecation And heavy was his sigh At least that’s what he wrote In the text that he sent Announcing the end of us We can be friends NO, WE CAN’T! You’re special FUCK YOU! I’ll call you DON’T BOTHER! See you around WHAT AN ASSHOLE! The next day, I saw him And we nervously spoke Was that a glint Or a tear In his crocodile eye Either way, he’s toast! Is there a chance NO FUCKING WAY! I’m sorry NO YOU’RE NOT! It doesn’t have to be this way A TEXT, A FUCKING TEXT! I was a little scared FUCKING LOSER! What the hell did you want When you asked me out I’m not here to waste my time If you ever grow a set And stop acting like a teen Call me. Tim Blodgett 2/16/20
That was fun to write and Grace loved it. She doesn’t hate him so the ending is appropriate. Where there’s life, there’s hope. Boy is he lucky that she’s a nice person!
I’ve had a bit of a dry spell lately, sometimes you got it and sometimes you don’t.